


Strong With The Force

by Davechicken



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Death of Shara Bey, Gen, Pre-slash at best
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-23
Updated: 2017-06-23
Packaged: 2018-11-18 00:27:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11279937
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Davechicken/pseuds/Davechicken
Summary: Poe is the first in his family.





	Strong With The Force

Poe Dameron is wide-eyed the first time he feels something from the tree in their yard. He’s playing in the summer sun, flying around with his arms wide, pretending he’s bombing the Death Star, protecting the tree, which is Endor, in his daydream.

A flash of memory, an echo of a voice he doesn’t recognise in reality, and he stops and stands and stares. 

He’s always had an over-active imagination, but this feels different. He doesn’t even notice that his father is watching him from the porch for long moments, and doesn’t hear the first few times his name is called for dinner. 

Poe doesn’t say anything about it. It’s probably just his daydream wishes, after all.

***

Some days later, and a man about the same age as his parents turns up. Plenty of people turn up on a regular basis here, many of whom Poe only knows in passing. 

This one, this one he knows.

The _galaxy_ knows Luke Skywalker. 

Poe smiles politely, fidgeting internally, trying to be on his best behaviour in front of such a wonderful war hero. Someone he admires, and he holds his chin up proudly when he’s brought to see him.

Knowing looks, which he doesn’t understand, and light questions. 

He doesn’t realise until much later what this was about. He thinks Luke came to see his parents, and that he’s just polite.

***

Sometimes he has strange dreams that feel different. A dark cloud in the distance. A tree over shadows and nightmares, and another over roots that seem to hold the sun in their embrace. Figures and voices. A cracking of X-Wings, and other things.

He tells his mom sometimes, but he doesn’t tell her everything. 

When she doesn’t come home, he blames himself. He _saw_ it, didn’t he? And he didn’t say anything. 

Poe is convinced he killed her.

***

That’s when Luke Skywalker comes back, with a boy who is eerily familiar, and also not. Like an echo of a memory, or perhaps of his parents. 

Ben, they call him, and Poe knows this is Princess Leia and General Han’s son. They sit together outside, talking politely, and not much else. Ben isn’t very forthcoming, he’s obviously shy. Poe would normally pull a person out of a funk, but that’s been harder since… Mom.

In front of the tree, and eventually their father and uncle come out.

Luke tells him something that he - well - he kind of knew. He knew, but he’d been hoping he was deluding himself. If he _is_ Force-sensitive, he should have known his mother was really in danger, and saved her. His smile is thin, and the adults leave him with the boy.

This is when Poe realises why Ben is here. 

“It is exciting and terrifying,” the boy admits, his tone and words weirdly so much older than his young face would imply.  


“Being a Jedi?”  


“Knowing you have the Force at _all_. Knowing you… have powers. And you could… use them for good, or…”  


“And not using them?”  


“My mother doesn’t. Except when it comes to knowing I’m being less than honest.”  


“I thought moms could just do that anyway,” Poe admits, ruefully.  


Which is when Ben’s expression shifts. “I… didn’t think.”

“It’s okay. You don’t need to never mention moms around me.”  


They lean into the grass, and the heat on Poe’s face makes him feel ancient. No longer like he’s a child, even if he still is. 

“What would… what would training mean?”  


***

They’d known. Poe makes sure to ask, when Luke and Ben have gone. His parents had known, and so had Luke, and they’d wanted him to have as much of a childhood as he could. 

Poe isn’t sure how grateful he is for that decision, but he can’t unmake it, so he either accepts it, or gets angry with people he loves. He tries for the first, and pushes away the second. 

Much as he loves his dad, he… knows it’s time to leave. So the next time the shuttle is in town, he goes along with the young boy who’s been sent to help him. He doesn’t _need_ help, but he appreciates the company.

***

Poe finds his talents lie in reactions. Like his mother, he’s a natural pilot. In combat, he’s agile and quick-witted. He uses his size and speed to best advantage. 

The Force makes him jump higher, run faster, react sooner. He can float things, and influence people… but it’s normally to do things they might already. He just hasn’t got the stomach for forcing anything.

Ben’s stronger at that. Ben’s stronger with plenty of things, except flying. The little voice inside of Poe is sometimes jealous that Ben comes from a long line of Jedi, and is thus stronger, but he tells the envy to shut up. He tells it to go away. Once, he would have given an arm and a leg to have the Force, to be special like that… and now he does, he _is_. 

Jealousy is not a good emotion to have, and it’s not like Ben is ever smug about it. If anything, the younger boy is embarrassed by it. He’s constantly trying to make himself look smaller, or less of a target. Poe doesn’t understand why, because there’s nothing _wrong_ with being great. People love you if you’re great, don’t they?

And Ben is great. Not just with the Force. He’s funny, friendly (when not shy), caring, and intelligent. He’s definitely his mother’s son, and Poe wonders what his own mother would think of this life for him. It’s going to be dangerous, yes, but… but it’s also going to be a life of service, and a life lived to the fullest. A life where he can give the most, do the most, be the most. 

She died as she lived, so it would be hypocritical not to do the same. 

He still dreams. The shadow-figure hasn’t gone, but the sun-ball hasn’t left, either. Sometimes he hears flickers of masked breathing, and he knows… he knows it’s Darth Vader, but he’s dead. Dead, and he died ‘as’ Anakin. 

But he hears the breathing, all the same. 

***

Ben is kind, but darkness clouds his brow. Poe somehow finds his own pain… leaves around him. Either sympathy makes his own aches fade, or else the boy drains his sorrow, or… something.

The ache turns into empathy, and he tries to make him smile. Late nights talking about nothing. Staring at the stars. Nonsense conversations, and lying so close that Poe can feel the air between them heat. 

He’s not sure what it means, and he’s not sure he’s ready to find out. 

When he does, though… he finds out _hard_. And then there’s no turning back at all. 


End file.
